Writing doesn’t always ‘take you there’.
Writing is sometimes cringe.
Then, we are invited to regret backpedalling too!… Read the rest
Blah LaLa
unbecoming
A world of pain, and I am not sure that sharing how I feel is going to do anything to help ameliorate this.… Read the rest
in absence
I would do anything to climb into a hug today.
Time has become some kind of hard edge.
All these years are buried beneath the surface of my mood.
I just want to be close.
The gaslighting has no explanation.… Read the rest
a missing piece
There is also a rather large pink elephant in the room.
I am not going to name it right now, because it isn’t my style.
But I am noticing it, and it doesn’t feel all that healthy if I am honest!… Read the rest
how far from reality could I climb?
The basic fact is that I am not welcome there. . .
So, I live in a world that I fear I will never really know if it is make believe or no. . . … Read the rest
logical assumption
‘Oh well’???
If the particular flavour of terror that my mind opens up to most mornings these days is anything to go by, I have made another stupid mistake. (It could just be hormones).
If I could get angry I would say that the reasoning behind this possible mistake was a very clear and undeniable indication that I simply would not be welcome there.… Read the rest
strange days
If I wasn’t listening to music with rapt attention would I be listening to someone telling a story?
The whole attachment situation is confusing, so I may simply refrain from comment.
Or just say – it is not exactly productive!… Read the rest
disembodied attachment
I am so angry.
And I don’t want to take the medicine that will likely soothe my soul.
It feels so right to be so aggravated.… Read the rest
isolated any which way
Splats.
There is something sobering about a situation where it simultaneously feels like I have made a terrible mistake and ‘it is all in my head’.
So it feels like the world is about to fall apart, it is my fault and yet at the same time I am completely foolish, and unable to share my fears with another living soul.… Read the rest
malheur
I need a hug,,, and there is no one here.
I feel sad, and it only serves to accentuate the absence of your presence in any concrete way.
Maybe I need to get off this ride.
It is a strong feeling of hopelessness.… Read the rest