It has been frustrating reading about how I have wanted to end my connection here,
OVER and over and **over** again.
I have tried a lot of different stuff,
None of it worked.
And to be honest the ‘relationship’ plot line is the least interesting of the lot.
Now, I am thinking of what I have been learning in psychology training,
About just letting thoughts come and go,
Not getting ‘caught up in them’, or ‘hooked’ as it were.
It is the perfect analogy, I feel for this situation.
I WILL WRITE.
Writing is what I am here to do.
Turtle comes and goes,
As everyone (who knows) tells me ‘HE IS NOT INTERESTED‘,
It takes a lot of pressure off,
Because all my senseless emoting about Turtle,
Has achieved nothing.
I am stunned at how I consistently say things to myself,
About how bad I feel, about how ridiculous the whole thing is,
And yet I keep writing.
BECAUSE THAT IS WHAT I DO.
Turtle might encourage it,
Him and Jimeny might keep me company (sometimes),
But that is about the extent of it.
I need to be the CHESSBOARD, and let these thoughts and feelings,
Move around the board,
Do what he wants.
And not get HOOKED.
‘Hooked’ is how I have explained the situation so many times,
So, it is time to ‘unhook’!!
